there is, apparently, something about me that lures non-traditional attractions and the opportunity for weird sexual encounters. this is not necessarily a bad thing, but i swear to god! isn't it supposed to be harder to get into the strange than to obtain the simple boy-girl-dating thing? i support all sorts of things politically and theoretically ( Read more... )

sometimes you just have to write it down. i would apologize for presuming an audience, but i would have posted privately if i really aimed to spare you. instead, i am minding my manners behind the cut. read on if you please, and ignore it you don't.

( tuesday afternoon. sunny, 36 degrees. )

okay, i do have a crush on this boy ( Read more... )

there is an emerging flirtation with one of my classmates. my relationship to the desire for this one is markedly different than usual. it's simple. it reminds me of what morgana and i used to say about passing lovelys at the chamber. "pretty. want it." there is little ambiguity or desparation and not because the desire is only physical...hmmm... ( Read more... )

ani says that in her between song talking on living in clip and i think it so often. now i have a good excuse to use it because i'm posting lyrics, though not ani's. actually, they're dave's. i know i've already yammered about some devil but this song has been on repeat since i got home. it pretty much sums up that melancholy out-of-love ( Read more... )

one morning a couple of weeks ago, after a night of drunken revelry anne cradled her hungover belly and said, "i don't know why i bother ( Read more... )

passion is such a strange thing. the ancients knew it. ardor, avarice, desire and their objects. how do all the potential relationships between these things get used (or not) in the service of reason? this, i think, is the fundamental question of political philosophy. funny that i should find many of the questions of my life in my work. how is it ( Read more... )

well 2003 is over. hopefully 2004 will be a better year. although, its only the third day and i've already had bad news. c came over this morning and ended our flirtation. in retrospect i guess it wasn't entirely unexpected. he didn't call me when i was home. hmmmmm...we'll see how i weather this one. speaking of weather i should note that there's ( Read more... )

tonight i cook dinner for C. he's not picky and i'm not trying anything totally new or too hard, so everything should come out okay. the menu is: oven fried butter chicken, rosemary potatoes and green beans. i have not decided how i will prepare the green beans. my natural inclination is to simply sautee them with liberal amounts of butter, but i ( Read more... )

hmmm...feeling pretty poetic tonight. i've been trying to make the final edits on my MA (thanks for your comments D), but keep wandering around my fiction and poetry files instead. it may be the glass of wine i had with dinner that's making me feel slightly fuzzy and romantic or perhaps it's that i've decided to stop torturing myself with ( Read more... )